Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Aimee's birthday dinner

Hi all, this will be a quick post. As many of you know, we had a birthday dinner for Aimee last Friday night. In fact, a few readers of this blog were there. But for those of you who were not, this is a quick recap.

"Happy Birthday Aimee, we will
never forget you!"
The evening was, in a word, wonderful. About 15 family members and friends met at Outback Steakhouse and had a nice dinner. We talked about Aimee, traded stories, and in general had a nice time. I made a wholly inadequate toast. Donna had some beautiful cards made up that she gave to everyone and said a few words. We had some cake, because a birthday party always needs cake. It was low-key, devoid of major emotional meltdowns (except by Rowan, at the very end of the night, because it was past her bedtime at that point), and had a spirit of fellowship of people experiencing a shared loss. In other words, it was exactly what I had hoped for.

My reason for having this event was simple - to remember Aimee's birthday in a way that invited others close to her to share in it and with each other. Burdens are lighter when carried with the help of others, and with Aimee's birthday, I just had this sense that the 'others' in my and Aimee's and Donna's circles could really use each other. I think I was right. And I truly appreciated all of those who were there in person or in spirit.

Considering why we were there, it was a pretty good night. I think Aimee would have approved.

PS: For those who don't know, there's a reason I picked Outback as a venue other than just that I like the food. I worked for them for almost 11 1/2 years, up until Aimee found out she was pregnant with Rowan. During the time we dated and the first year of our marriage, she would often come in late in the evening when it typically wasn't too busy, and sit at the bar and tease me/flirt with me while I worked. I really enjoyed seeing her, and many members of the staff there grew to love her (big surprise). So there was a really nice connection to her that I felt was recognized, even if just by me, by having her birthday dinner there.


  1. This was a cool and poignant reflection. What a wonderful way to honor the memory of a wonderful woman! Thanks Pat! And thanks to the Outback!

  2. What a wonderful evening for all of you to share in the celebration of Aimee's birthday. Even thought she wasn't present physically I can imagine she was there in sprit, and smiling :)

  3. WOW - what a very cool thing to do... to honor your lovely wife by sharing her 1st birthday in heaven with those she loved - and who loved her! HAPPY BIRTHDAY Miss Aimee!

  4. I agree with the other posts, what a very cool and wonderful thing to do. I'll bet your lovely wife was having Outback with her father in heaven and celebrating with you! I'm sure it was good for your family and friends as well!