|In pictures like this, you can|
see how much Rowan loved
My goal has been to learn how to live, and to move on, without trying to forget Aimee or do anything to dishonor her memory. It hasn't been easy to move on, because many days I have wanted to just sit at home and stare at photos or videos of Aimee for hours on end. And sometimes, I do in fact indulge that for an hour or two here and there. It feels good to remember how much fun we had and how much love we had for each other. But, to quote someone near and dear to me, "Life should be lived for the living." To me that includes first and foremost Rowan, but also family and friends, as well as new people who come into my life.
So as I look back over the last ten months, and at how these posts that I've written have progressed, I can see that my efforts are paying off. It was extremely difficult at first. In fact, I had to pretend I was getting on with my life, because I didn't feel it at all. But now, I do feel it. Things are different. Not happy-go-lucky all the time or without pain, but that crushing weight of grief is no longer ever-present on my shoulders.
I honestly believe that would make Aimee happy.